


The one where they're in a canoe.

by emef



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Drabble, Gen, beavers - Freeform, nothing really happens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-21
Updated: 2013-06-21
Packaged: 2017-12-15 15:51:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/851325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emef/pseuds/emef
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Mr Spock, tell me : why are we doing this?"</p><p>Spock considered the question.  "Well, Sir, after the beavers..."</p>
            </blockquote>





	The one where they're in a canoe.

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this years ago. Has a bit of a Due South feel to it.
> 
> I tagged it as a Reboot fic, but it could read as either cast, honestly.

So one time, Kirk and Spock were on a canoe. How they got there is a long story, but it involved an ion storm, Kirk's tricorder, a slight mis-translation of local dialect, and some beavers. But now they were paddling, sunlight was glinting attractively in Kirk's eye, and Spock had said "interesting" four times in the last twenty minutes. They were approaching their destination at an acceptable speed, but didn't really care.

Without warning, Kirk set down his paddle, pulled an apple seemingly out of nowhere, and leaned back. He crunched into it obnoxiously.

He turned to Spock, and between bites, asked : "Mr Spock, tell me : why are we doing this?"

Spock considered the question. "Well, Sir, after the beavers..."

"No!" Kirk interjected. "You misunderstand me ; I know _how_ we got here, I just don't know _why_."

Spock paused before answering. Then he looked at Kirk like he was wavering between being a wiseass and being... not too much of a wiseass.

"You are inquiring as to the meaning of life, Captain?"

"I suppose so, Mr. Spock."

"I see."

Spock did the thing where he moved his head to one side, as though he were considering a specimen under a microscope, and Kirk did the thing where he beamed with some kind of ill-begotten confidence in himself. An onlooker would have assumed that they were just about to lunge and passionately kiss each other.

Then a sea monster burst out of the water, and they snapped out of it. Kirk efficiently threw his apple cork at one of the monster's eyes. Spock stabbed it with one end of his paddle. They paddled in the opposite direction as fast as possible.

They went some distance before Kirk risked looking behind them. The monster did not seem to have moved. Kirk slowed his paddling.

Spock said : "Sir, may I offer to take the helm?"

Kirk answered : "thank you Spock, that will not be necessary."

In between paddle movements, Spock said : "understood".

There were a few seconds of silence.

Spock said : "Sir, perhaps placing your paddle at a higher angle would lead to more efficient steering."

"I assure you, Mr. Spock, I am well-acquainted with the procedure for all types of watercraft, even those of small size."

"Understood", answered Spock.

There were a few more seconds of silence.

Spock spoke again. "Sir, might I suggest a shorter paddle movement?"

"Spock, are you... backseat paddling?"

"Perhaps I am demonstrating that the meaning of life is lively conversation, Captain."

 

The end.


End file.
